A sentimental education?

Queen Victoria to the King of the Belgians

Windsor Castle, February 11, 1840

My dearest Uncle,

I write to you from here, the happiest, happiest Being that ever existed.  Really, I do not think it possible for any one in the world to be happier, or as happy as I am.  He is an Angel, and his kindness and affection for me is really touching. To look in those dear eyes, and that dear sunny face, is enough to make me adore him. What I can do to make him happy will be my greatest delight. Independent of my great personal happiness, the reception we both met with yesterday was the most gratifying and enthusiastic I ever experienced; there was no end of the crowds in London, and all along the road. I was a good deal tired last night, but am quite well again to-day, and happy....

My love to dear Louise. Ever your affectionate,

Victoria R.

***********

(Victoria and Albert in a tender moment during their engagement.  Photo credit: gogmsite.com)

It would be the understatement of the century to say that Victoria was pleased by Albert, their wedding celebrations, and the night that followed.  After the wedding breakfast and reception, the newly married couple had settled into Windsor for a quiet dinner and a little calming music on the piano.  Victoria had a headache from all the excitement and laid on a couch while Albert sat beside her and held her hand.  The two later retired to their bedroom and, if Victoria’s letter above and following journal entry are to be believed, consummated their marriage. 

At ½ p.10 I went and undressed and was very sick, and at 20 m. p.10 we both went to bed; (of course in one bed), to lie by his side, and in his arms, and on his dear bosom, and be called by names of tenderness, I have never yet heard used to me before – was bliss beyond belief! Oh! this was the happiest day of my life! – May God help me to do my duty as I ought and be worthy of such blessings!

While Victoria was almost certainly a virgin on their wedding night, but was Albert?  Although Albert never had a string of mistresses, illegitimate children, or sexually transmitted diseases as many other royal men of the time, I do find it hard to believe he was allowed to marry as a virgin.  As Albert once told George Anson, his private secretary in Britain, it was not difficult to resist the temptation of women during his bachelor days as “that species of vice disgusted him.”  Albert probably is referring to the act of womanizing (as his father and brother were fond) rather than women themselves, but it’s a curious attitude for young man to take. 

With all of the concern before marriage over him being even interested enough in sex to keep Victoria happy and provide heirs for the country, I have a hunch that Albert was probably taken to a brothel as a young man and commanded to find a lady to teach him the ropes.  His far more libertine brother Ernst may have accompanied him.  And although it may have bothered Albert a great deal to do patronize a lady of the evening, he was likely talked into it on the pretense that on his wedding night, he’d need to be the teacher. 

But if Albert did receive a “sentimental education,” it’s doubtful he enjoyed any part of it, despite perhaps understanding its importance.  It is very possible that his chief advisors at the time – King Leopold and Baron Stockmar – would have emphasized to Albert all that he needed to know to be a capable husband to his new wife.  The young Albert was very dutiful if nothing else, and understood how important a successful relationship with Victoria would be.  While perhaps not as wildly infatuated in her as she in him, it’s not outlandish to assume that he liked her very much and wanted to make her happy.  

If Albert did have sexual experience before he was married, it may not have been at all positive.  In the late 1850s, both Albert and Victoria were urging Vicky to search high and low in Germany to find a suitable princess for Bertie to marry.  It was believed that an early marriage and some independence would tame Bertie’s love of pleasure and feared descent into sin.  The couple enticed Bertie to behave himself during a tour of Canada and the United States in 1860, promising that if he remained unblemished, he would be able to purchase his own estate on his return.  Bertie conducted himself very well on his tour, but moved into military instruction on his return; it was at this time that Bertie had what was likely his first sexual experience with Nellie Clifden.  Albert and Victoria were absolutely crushed at Bertie’s misstep, which was in actuality a rather normal occurrence for an aristocratic young man of his age.  It is Albert and Victoria’s devastated reaction that makes me wonder if Albert felt so awful about his own first experience that he did not want Bertie to “suffer” the same way, not understanding that this was something Bertie welcomed. 

If Albert was not virgin on his wedding night, his personality suggests that his sexual experience was probably very limited. It is probable that although she had no physical experiences, Victoria likely had a suitable married lady who talked with her about what to expect.  It is a bit surprising, however, that two sexual novices had not only a satisfying night, but also a spectacular one in Victoria’s case.  The couple’s first child, Vicky, was born in November 1840; it’s possible that she was conceived on the couple’s honeymoon or soon after. 

The couple went on to have eight more children after Vicky, although the succession could have been considered fairly secure after three or four.  Their youngest child, Beatrice was only four when Albert died, so it is likely that their conjugal relationship was either still going on or had ended not long before Albert’s death.  Regardless of what they knew or had experienced before their marriage, it is safe to say that Albert and Victoria found pleasure enough in one another.  But it is certainly thought provoking to wonder, with a straight-laced soul like Albert, if it began with Victoria or with someone else?